My mom's journey with cancer ended at about 4:30 this afternoon. She had been in a lot of pain this morning, so we had her receive a different pain medication around noon, and according to my dad, that probably speeded things up. I was unfortunately on the bus home from my wind ensemble rehearsal at the time when my sister phoned me, but she and my dad were there. I do feel pretty mad at myself, but I couldn't have known. She appeared about the same this morning when I left just after 11, and the drug was given at 12, so I couldn't have known, but at the same time, if I had thought that, I wouldn't have gone! It was very peaceful-my dad and my sister were talking about going to A and W and they looked over and she had just stopped breathing. That was it. Of course, today WAS the day that the buses were eternally long, and I didn't get up to the hospital until almost 5:30. It was a very, very very strange experience walking into that hospital room. The first thing that was weird was that my sister was holding my mom's prayer shawl, which my mom had been almost inseperable from the past year or so. And then of course there was my mom. She looked exactly as she has looked since she started on the pain medication on October 24th...like she would just start breathing again.
I'd been thinking it would be tonight, so it was somewhat of a shock even though we'd gone every day for the past more than two weeks thinking it was her last.
It's over. Almost a year since she first started getting diagnosed...what a year. And exactly four weeks, almost to the hour that my grandma died.
Musicgirl, I'm praying for your family. I'm so sorry for your loss. I pray God will comfort you and and your family as you miss your mother and think of all the joy she is experiencing now as she rejoices in heaven. You're right, you couldn't have known. Praise God she was peaceful and comfortable. Love, Christie
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