Depressed...again...evenings..

For probably two main reasons right now, I am feeling quite depressed. The first is that I got another rejection phone call, after being told a few days ago that they were going to register (Aunt said Yes, Yes, reserve a spot!, dad tonight phoned and said no...to be honest I was confused), and the other came when doing a bit more research about my one friend's medical condition, SMA syndrome. What really depressed me was the 1 in 3 chance of death. Ouch. Please keep her in your prayers...it is an incredibly rare condition, only about 500 cases have been diagnosed (perhaps because some doctors don't really believe it exists), and she is really struggling right now (tube feedings past the narrowed part have been on-again, off-again (and the first time, they placed the tube wrong...)) and is in pain from time to time as well. I wish I could take some of her pain. Not only that, but a bed in the treatment facility out of province that she was going to go to to hopefully kick anorexia's rear once and for all came up, but of course she can't go at this point. I hope that when she's better from this that she'll be able to go there and get on with her life.

I should end with something happy or positive (it's become one of my nighttime journal rules if I chose to write  before going to sleep because otherwise, I tend to have disturbing dreams related to the content of the entry-ie, had a disturbing dream about being in the ward for eating disorder treatment (along with my friend N), not even having a bed, and then being interrogated by the nurses as to how I wasn't making any progress, and my friend David, who was one of the friends that saw me through my hospitalization now more than three years ago asking me how I'd ended up there. I was very happy to wake up...very happy. So, I don't want to think about that stuff before going to sleep. Okay...positive thought...some of the drywall is up in the basement! It's really starting to take shape, so hopefully in not that long I'll be able to actually take parents and children downstairs to the studio. I look forward to that. Oh, and my friend C loved the sweater for her little boy. I hope my friend C.S gets her package soon and likes her prayer shawl and the sweater for her daughter A.

Oh and we got a little bit of rain yesterday and today!!!!!!!! I haven't cut the grass since my birthday(ish) which was back on July 3rd...I don't mind not cutting the grass, but I really feel for the farmers. First the flood, and now the draught. We normally get about 70-75mm of rain in July, we got 10mm. Not exactly normal! More rain, please.